Welcome to our descriptions lesson
- In this section, you will learn
- What descriptions are
- Why descriptions are important
- How to use descriptions to improve behaviors
Descriptions overview
What is a description?
- Storytelling or narrating out loud what you see your child doing.
- Telling your child what they are doing right now.
- Saying what you think your child is doing or making. It's ok if you're wrong!
- Talking about your child's positive or neutral behaviors, not their problem behaviors.
Descriptions are helpful any time your child is doing something good!
What do descriptions sound like?
- You’ve got one shoe on and tied. Now you're putting your other shoe on.
- You’ve got the blue marker, and you’re making little circles all linked together–a long chain of little blue circles.
- [playing Uno] You put down the “Draw 4." Now I have to draw four cards!
- You're building such a tall tower.
- You are really concentrating on that drawing.
Describe live in action
Why is it important to describe?
Click below to read more:
Descriptions let a child know that you see them and notice the good things they do.
Look for times when your child is behaving well or following directions. Take a little time to describe what they’re doing. This lets them know that you notice the good behavior!
Some children are quiet. Descriptions let them take the lead and get used to your being there.
Sometimes children refuse to talk with you when they are upset. Descriptions do not demand a response from your child. They let you give attention to any appropriate behaviors and show you are available.
Descriptions are a type of mindfulness. Describing what is happening in the moment helps you focus. It makes you more aware of what you are doing and how you are doing it. This helps you and your child slow down, stay calm, and enjoy the moment.
For example, you might find yourself getting distracted during play. You might start thinking about things you need to do. Try to just watch your child and describe everything they do.
Descriptions let children hear about what they have just done. It’s a great tool for slowing down kids that get easily distracted or frustrated.
There will be times when your child is learning how to do something and wants to do it by themself. Sometimes this can be frustrating. You want to help your child but also respect their wish to try it alone. You can be involved by describing what they’re doing. Make sure to describe what they are actively doing rather than what they should do next. This lets them be in charge, but still have you involved.
Very young children learn words and concepts with descriptions. Use a lot of descriptions during play and any interactions.
For example, “You picked up the blue block,” “You’re pointing at the dog,” and “You’re playing the drum.”
Make sure to focus on what your child is doing rather than what you are doing.
Young children turn descriptions into their own internal voice. They need this voice for planning, completing tasks, and being creative. Use a lot of descriptions during playtime and any time your child is completing a task or direction.
For example, when cleaning up toys, describe “You’ve got the bin. You are cleaning up so fast! You’re almost done. You got the last piece.”
For older children, descriptions help them slow down, concentrate, and be more mindful. Use fewer descriptions to focus in on good things your child is doing.
If your child gets dressed without being asked, say “You got dressed already.” If your child struggles with homework, sit with them and describe their work “You chose to start with math. You finished the first row.”
When and how should I describe?
Learn how descriptions can be used by selecting a specific difficult behavior below.
More: Learn how descriptions can be used by selecting a specific positive behavior/goal below.
Pay attention to your words
Click below to read more:
Describe what your child is doing rather than the toy or game they’re playing.
Sometimes it helps to start sentences with “you are…”
Don’t ask your child what they are doing. Take your best guess, and describe what you see.
This can be really hard. It might help to start sentences with “I see you are…”
Keep the focus on the child’s behavior rather than their emotions or thoughts. Try saying “You are smiling,” instead of “You look happy”.
Labeling feelings is a great regulation skill, but it is not a description.
When you describe, children will do that behavior more. Describing problem behavior gives it lots of attention. Your child will likely do it even more.
Imagine your child starts ripping a paper. Use other strategies, like strategic attention and when-then statements, in the moment. Then use descriptions as soon as your child starts doing something you like.
Caregiver Voices
Other caregivers share how they use descriptions at home:
“I do things differently since PC-CARE, with my communication, how I speak to the children in my care. I talk to them differently; I communicate a lot differently. Like, I narrate a lot; I just kind of speak out what I’m seeing them do and let them lead their play.”
“I found that when I started using more descriptions, it even helped him learn things. Like, for example, when I described the red car and the blue car, he started learning his colors.”
“He likes for me to describe his behavior. I remember doing that one time and trying to slow him down and saying it really slow, and it was like, ‘he’s actually moving slow!’. This is really weird, but it actually worked to slow him down because he had such a high energy level.”
How would you describe?
Question #1
Which of the options below would be good descriptions for this child in this moment? You can pick more than one.
Question #2
Which of the options below would be good descriptions for this child in this moment? You can pick more than one.
Question #3
Which of the options below would be good descriptions for this child in this moment? You can pick more than one.
Ideas for fun describe activities
Select Below
2-5 minutes
Have your child draw a picture on your back. Describe what they do while they are drawing. Then guess what they drew, using a behavior description (“You drew a heart”). Then switch places and you draw on your child’s back and have them guess your picture.
10-20 minutes
Have one person think of an activity or task and everyone guess what they are doing. This kind of Charades is great for younger children and great practice in giving behavior descriptions!
Plan for descriptions
Think about how you can use descriptions at home.
Hooray! You've learned a new skill: Describe
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