Choices

Using choices for defiance Recognize the behavior: Refuses to leave a friend’s house when it’s time to go home. Identify what you want to see:  Saying goodbye and leaving the house. Use the Skill: You might give choices about how to leave. For example, “You have two choices: you can say goodbye at the door […]

When-Then/If-Then

Using when-then & if-then statements for defiance Recognize the behavior: Refuses to leave a friend’s house when it’s time to go home. Identify what you want to see:  Saying goodbye and leaving the house. Use the Skill: Talk about what will happen after they listen. For example, “When we get in the car, you can […]

Strategic Attention

Using strategic attention for defiance Recognize the behavior: Refuses to leave a friend’s house when it’s time to go home. Identify what you want to see:  Saying goodbye and leaving the house. Use the Skill: Try to ignore whining or tantrums about leaving. Attend to leaving behaviors, like picking up toys, putting on shoes, or […]

Redirect

Using redirect for defiance Recognize the behavior: Refuses to leave a friend’s house when it’s time to go home. Identify what you want to see:  Saying goodbye and leaving the house. Use the Skill: Talk about how you are getting ready to go.  Maybe talk about the fun things you will do when you get […]

Adjust the Environment

Using adjust the environment for defiance Recognize the behavior: Refuses to leave a friend’s house when it’s time to go home. Identify what you want to see:  Saying goodbye and leaving the house. Use the Skill: One idea is to check how many toys are out 15 minutes before you leave. Help put extra toys […]

Transitions

Using transitions for defiance Recognize the behavior: Refuses to leave a friend’s house when it’s time to go home. Identify what you want to see:  Saying goodbye and leaving the house. Use the Skill: Use transitions to prepare to leave. For example, you could set a timer or say  “Choose one last activity before we […]

Recovery

Using recovery for aggression Recognize the behavior: Hits or bites a sibling who took their toy. Identify what you want to see: Staying calm and asking for help when the sibling takes the toy. Use the Skill: After the consequence, use your own calming skills. Then spend some time in calm or fun play until […]

Helping

Using helping for aggression Recognize the behavior: Hits or bites a sibling who took their toy. Identify what you want to see: Staying calm and asking for help when the sibling takes the toy. Use the Skill: If you are very quick, you might stop a very young child before they hit or bite. Gently […]

Effective Commands

Using effective commands for aggression Recognize the behavior: Hits or bites a sibling who took their toy. Identify what you want to see: Staying calm and asking for help when the sibling takes the toy. Use the Skill: You might use a command like, “It’s ok to be angry, but please use your words to […]

Consistent Consequences

Using consistent consequences for aggression Recognize the behavior: Hits or bites a sibling who took their toy. Identify what you want to see: Staying calm and asking for help when the sibling takes the toy. Use the Skill: Possible praise: “You are playing so nicely together!”  Possible negative consequence: spending a short amount of time […]